mailbomb |snip | ask elvis

Some of the press are asking the relatives of John Denver if they will
turn his Colorado ranch into a "Graceland"-type way for the relatives to
exploit themselves sOme dOuGH now that the cash-cOw has smacked
head-first into the PAciFiC!

What do you think about their comparison between you and John Denver,
and are you two going to cut a duet album anytime sOon?

LObsTer

elvis: Whoah!  no way, hooooSAY! SIR!  I cut John Denver off when he started pissin' everyone off  with his shoot a entertainer up in space bit!  And the man beat his wife, was nasty to his neighbors and he dranked when he was in his airplane!  He was a talented man, who was outright ungrateful to his nieghbors in Aspen!  Gotta love thy neighbor boy!  Walk a mile in that mans shoes FIRST, then ask him how his day's been....  Don't ever raise your hand on your old lady!  She's the mother of your children.  No way! I mayah drove my wife 'Cilla nuts, but I ain't never laid no hand on her pretty face!  Don't get  me wrong, John Denver's gunna be greatly missed, the world's lost a wonderful country singer, but other wise him and I are on different terms.  I was a Army boy!  He sung with Kermit the frog....  I sung with Frank Sinatra.

In light of the christmas spirit... why don't ya sing us a song?  lynda louis, adoreing fan!  NM.

Elvis: Why! I'm blessed with my adoreing fans!  well, i'm staying at any record oh, ah, cd store and i'm flat and shiney! about 5 inches square!   I'm about $15 and need a home from this massive orphanage!  I look great and play wonderfully!  Cd players eat me right up!  And I can sing to you any time, all the time!  And I don't complain...  I'm a CD man!

Got any good suggestions on different kind of peanutbutter  sandwiches I can make?
Thanks,  Josh

Now, by golly man that's a question!  Where you been all my life son?  Now, let's see.... I'm real fussy when it comes to my peanut butter, soo fussy that I eat it even though I'm told I may be allergic to it.  What do doctors know anyhow?

• Penut butter and jelly is a traditional fav. of mine, very simple and there's soo many varieties of jelly out there! Hell man, I love it when they stick that ol' jelly in a donut!  Penut butter and jelly donuts!  Why ain't anyone cum up wif that already?  Oh, son...  Penut butter and bacon, peanut butter and: peanuts, jellybeans, olives, raisins... Fried in butter with bananas and raisins too!   and just raisens. 
• Roasted Penut butter and chicken... This is a great dish.   Peanut butter makes a great sauce!  No bullshit man!
• Peanut butter and chocolate on sugared tortilla shells.  Melt the chocolate and stir it in the peanut butter and don't worry this will all get nice and creamy so you can pour it all over syrupy strawberry filled tortilla... Make sure there's alot of powdered sugar... SUGAR not  pharmaceutical coke!

Man Josh, you makin' me hungry... I ah, gotta go, a jelly donut awaits my throng.  Yours, Elvis!  P.S.  you cum up wif any ideas Josh, drop me a line.  Merry Christmas!

Hey E!  roger m. of millersville MD!  Nice to have you back again!  I seen you and Robert Howington are a item?!  (is this a homo sexual thing?)

ELVIS:  Now you wait there just a minute young man!   Robert t'aint no fag and I'm sure as hell ain't though that damn John Lennon was... and Robert Goulet!  Robert and I are good friends... I like them texans they pull no bullshit!  Nor dick!  (when it come's to the man folk down there)  The only thing they pull are GUNS! when a smart ass like you come's along and jokes about something serious like homosexuality and friendship! 

 (picture of robert and elvis not found... try again um..lattah!)